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theidoctor
10-27-2010, 09:57 AM
its kind of entertaining, right?

anyways... they may get really lame and lets try to keep it somewhat clean


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2 antennas met on a roof. They fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasnt anything to brag about but the reception was great!!!!
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jloya
10-27-2010, 10:04 AM
ill give it a shot

a blonde is trying to figure out a puzzle for quite some time....

....her husband walks in, "hunny what are you trying to do?"

Wife: "its a tiger! its supposed to be a tiger!"

Husband: "hunny, put the frosted flakes back into the box..."

hurr hurr hurr :p

JLMitch
01-24-2011, 10:18 AM
^^ lol

What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?
Nacho cheese.

Count X
01-24-2011, 10:22 AM
Soo...
Horse walks into a bar...
Bartender says...
Why the long face?



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smalltowngirl13
01-24-2011, 11:33 AM
This is not my favorite...but it is funny...


How do you get a kleenex to dance?

… Put a little boogey in it.

smalltowngirl13
01-24-2011, 11:35 AM
And a blonde joke... ;)


Ever wonder how blondes remember their Passwords?


During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:


MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy


When asked why such a big password, she said, "It had to be at least 8 characters long.

OR

One day a blonde was having trouble with her computer, so she calls tech support.

"Hello how can I help you?," the tech support woman says.

"Yes, I am having trouble getting my computer to do anything," the blonde says.

"What window do you have open?"

"Are you crazy! it's freezing cold outside!"

DebianDog
01-24-2011, 11:37 AM
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?

mikeinrichmond
01-24-2011, 12:34 PM
Almost anything from Rodney Dangerfield:

"I went to see my doctor, I told him "Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me? He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."

jloya
01-24-2011, 12:36 PM
And a blonde joke... ;)


Ever wonder how blondes remember their Passwords?


During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:


MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy


When asked why such a big password, she said, "It had to be at least 8 characters long.

OR

One day a blonde was having trouble with her computer, so she calls tech support.

"Hello how can I help you?," the tech support woman says.

"Yes, I am having trouble getting my computer to do anything," the blonde says.

"What window do you have open?"

"Are you crazy! it's freezing cold outside!"




I work tech support and honestly i get stuff like that dailllyyy

"I need you to open my computer"

"your computer?!? how they heck am i going to open your computer??!?!"

EDIT: LOL as i posted i that this lady says the exact same thing! no ma'am my computer is part of your computer....ohhhh so you want me to go to the internet??

noppe.....

smalltowngirl13
01-24-2011, 12:46 PM
I work tech support and honestly i get stuff like that dailllyyy

"I need you to open my computer"

"your computer?!? how they heck am i going to open your computer??!?!"

EDIT: LOL as i posted i that this lady says the exact same thing! no ma'am my computer is part of your computer....ohhhh so you want me to go to the internet??

noppe.....

LOL...that is funny!

JLMitch
01-24-2011, 01:26 PM
Tee hee at the eight characters joke.

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Count X
01-24-2011, 01:33 PM
So I saw this in a public restroom.
You know the signs they have that say " employees must wash hands before leaving restroom"
Someone wrote " if there are no employees present, can I wash them myself"

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JLMitch
01-24-2011, 02:36 PM
Reminds me of this
http://184.72.239.143/mu/aefc95db-d4a8-d189.jpg

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mikeinrichmond
01-24-2011, 09:01 PM
A new client had just come in to see a famous lawyer.
"Can you tell me how much you charge?", said the client.
"Of course", the lawyer replied, "I charge $500 to answer two questions."
"Well that's a bit steep, isn't it?"
"Yes it is", said the lawyer, "And here's your bill."

Count X
01-24-2011, 10:08 PM
^^^
Hilarious!
Man who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with smelly finger.

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greevedogg
01-24-2011, 10:18 PM
Two cannibals are feasting on a clown...

One cannibal says to the other: "does this taste funny to you?"

mikeinrichmond
01-27-2011, 08:01 PM
Observations on Men and Women:

Women love cats.
Men may say they love cats, but when women are not looking, will men kick cats.

A woman worries about the future -- until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future -- until he gets a wife.

A woman knows all about her children. She knows about their best friends, romances, secret hopes and dreams, favorite foods, fears and dental appointments.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.
If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bruno, Scrappy, Peanut-Head and Godzilla.

cruckus
01-29-2011, 04:58 PM
Haha cheeseburgers! Three old men were arguing who has the worst problems the 70 year old man says every morning I wake up at 6 and have to pee like a race horse problem is only dribbles come out. The 80 year old man says that's nothing every morning I get up at 5 and have to poo like no ones business only problem is its rock hard and I can't get any out! The 90 year old man says my problem is at 4 I pee like a race horse and poop like a champ! The other two men say what's the problem then? The 90 year old replies I don't get up til 9!

tuned4trash666
02-07-2011, 06:18 AM
A cheeseburger walks into a bar and sits down to order a drink. Bartendender comes up to him and says "sorry we dont serve food here".


3 guys walk into a bar. The 4th guy ducks.

What did the drummer get on his IQ test? Drool!

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Backnblack
02-07-2011, 06:29 AM
Let's keep it Family Friendly.....

jstafford1
02-07-2011, 06:36 AM
What did the guitar player do when he locked his keys in the car??
















Spent the next hour trying to get the drummer out.


Sent from somewhere...

Robocop2
03-03-2011, 09:04 AM
How do you know you girlfriend is getting fat?
She fits into your wifes clothes!

I don't condone cheating, its just funny.

jloya
03-03-2011, 09:38 AM
How do you know you girlfriend is getting fat?
She fits into your wifes clothes!

I don't condone cheating, its just funny.

lolll

olyfunk
03-10-2011, 02:22 PM
What do you call a midget, claravoyant on the lamb?



A small medium at large.